By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2026-09-15 20:35:15 | Updated at 2026-09-15 21:32:26
58 minutes ago
Brought to you by: Yippee TV
Raising a toddler can be a challenge, but entertaining your toddler can be even more difficult. It's not uncommon for parents to run out of ideas for ways to keep kids busy. The Babylon Bee is here to help.
Here are 10 guaranteed ways to entertain your toddler:
Buy an expensive new graphics card for your gaming computer: Your child will love the box it comes in.
Find the world's most annoying movie and play it over and over: Just like your ancestors did before you.
Throw your toddler up into the air, and then do it again: Repeat. Forever.
Give a PowerPoint presentation on Einstein's theory of relativity: Your child will find this fascinating.
Be a horsey: You will have back problems for the rest of your life, but your toddler will have fun.
Let your toddler watch you build LEGO: But don't let them touch anything. Let's not be ridiculous here.
Have your child assemble an IKEA bookshelf: It'll turn out just as well as if you tried to do it yourself.
Read them a Bible story: Something from the book of Judges would be perfect.
Give them the second video game controller and tell them they're playing: Don't worry, they're not smart enough to know the difference.
Spend three hours watching Bluey: Fun fact — this one is fun even if you're by yourself.
See? Keeping your toddler entertained is easy. Have your own suggestions for keeping kids busy? Post them in the comments below.
NOT SATIRE: Need an 11th way that doesn't involve emptying every kitchen cabinet?
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