Stephanie Matto, 34, is a TV personality known for her appearance on the TLC reality show '90 Day Fiancé' in 2020. She wrote a tell-all memoir, 'Empty Blood', about her experiences.
This year, like every other, I’m hosting a big family Thanksgiving at my house in Connecticut.
My mother and stepfather are coming, and some of our relatives are even flying in from the Czech Republic to celebrate with us.
I’ll be elbow-deep in a turkey in the kitchen most of the day, cooking up a traditional feast. There will be Champagne, pumpkin pie and yams aplenty.
But one thing won’t be the same: this year, my brother isn’t coming.
In fact, he’s banned. I won’t let him come – not after he voted for Donald Trump.
At 24, brother is a decade younger than me, but we’ve always been super close. He lived with me for a while, and talked all the time.
I've been lucky and certainly had my successes in life, so I’ve always been happy to support him financially: I bought him a BMW when he turned 21, I pay his phone bill, and when he asks me for $50, I’ll send him $100.
But a few months before the election, he changed.
Stephanie Matto, 34, is a TV personality known for her appearance on the TLC reality show '90 Day Fiancé' in 2020. She wrote a tell-all memoir, 'Empty Blood', about her experiences.
I’ll be elbow-deep in a turkey in the kitchen most of the day, cooking up a traditional feast. There will be Champagne, pumpkin pie and yams aplenty. But one thing won’t be the same: this year, my brother (left) isn’t coming.
He started sending me right-wing news stories and social media posts peddling conspiracy theories – all of which I tried to debunk or fact-check.
It was scary. I felt like my brother was being brainwashed. You see, my family has always been liberal. My mother and I are proud Democrats, and I guess I always assumed my brother would follow our lead.
I warned him that young men are being increasingly targeted by fake news on social media and to not believe everything he reads and sees.
But he didn’t listen, he’d gone too far down the rabbit hole.
Still, in early November, he told me and my mother – who he lives with and who also helps support him financially – that he was going to vote for the Green Party candidate Jill Stein.
My mother and I, tried to explain to him that he would be basically wasting his vote, but we didn’t try to stop him. It was his choice, after all, and Connecticut is a safely blue state.
But on Election Night, we found out he had lied: My brother had voted for Trump.
As the results rolled in, he couldn’t contain himself as he boasted about how Trump had won, and how ‘good’ he would be for the country.
My mother is a self-made woman and a proud feminist: she moved to the US from the Czech Republic when I was seven and has built a successful life for herself.
When Trump won again, she was devastated that a man who has been found liable for sexual assault could be elected President.
It was scary. I felt like my brother was being brainwashed. You see, my family has always been liberal. My mother and I are proud Democrats, and I guess I always assumed my brother would follow our lead. (Pictured: Matto with her brother).
He started sending me right-wing news stories and social media posts peddling conspiracy theories, all of which I tried to debunk or fact-check.
My brother taunted her, essentially bragging about it until she started to cry. She was so upset she kicked him out of her house for the night and he had to go and stay at his girlfriend’s.
My mother has never been able to stay mad at my brother for long, so she let him back in the next day. And as she forgave him, I decided to ignore the situation entirely and move on. I didn’t even mention it to him.
But then, out of the blue, he texted me saying: ‘Trump won, this is going to be so great for Bitcoin.’
That was the final straw. I was furious. How could he not see how terrible this all is?
It was a slap in the face. He has two women in his life – me and my mother – who have taught him to respect women. His mother is an immigrant, and both of us support him handsomely. But he voted against our best interests and everything that we stand for – and then had the audacity to rub it in our faces.
I blocked his number and told my mother he was no longer welcome at my house for Thanksgiving. If he shows up, I'll send him away.
My mother desperately wants me to forgive him. But I’m not ready to have that conversation – and don’t know when I will be.
The issue with my brother is that he is so used to getting what he wants that he has no respect for our opinions and feelings.
So I said to myself, 'not this time.'
I blocked his number and told my mother he was no longer welcome at my house for Thanksgiving. If he shows up, I'll send him away.
I’m not setting out to disown my brother, that would never happen, but I do need to teach him a lesson.
He needs to know that he can't make our mother cry and then expect me to open my door and welcome him with open arms. That’s not how life works.
When I’m ready, if he comes to me and apologizes, and can explain why he voted for Trump, maybe we can work it out. But it’s not going to happen before Thanksgiving.
Recently, I shared what has happened in a TikTok post and the response was surprising.
Loads of people came to my defence, even some Trump supporters, who said the way he had treated my mother was disgusting.
I think there is a general sentiment among Democrats now that we’re done being nice: if you voted for Trump, great, you got what you wanted. But you have to accept the consequences, whatever they are.
It’s a new attitude, and it applies to my brother too, basically: f*** around and find out.