The Babylon Bee

Trump Worried Everyone Will Quit Before He Can Tell Them 'You're Fired'

Trump Worried Everyone Will Quit Before He Can Tel...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Reports circulated today that P...

6 days ago 3
Conservative Husbands Sacrificially Volunteer To Have Twice The Sex To Make Up For Lib Sex Strike

Conservative Husbands Sacrificially Volunteer To H...

U.S. — In response to an alarming new trend of wom...

6 days ago 3
RFK, Jr. Jumped In Dark Alley By Count Chocula, Chester Cheetah, Kool-Aid Man

RFK, Jr. Jumped In Dark Alley By Count Chocula, Ch...

WASHINTON, D.C. — Presumptive cabinet member and a...

6 days ago 4
Sociopath Responds To 'How's It Going' By Actually Explaining How It's Going

Sociopath Responds To 'How's It Going' By Actually...

GAINESVILLE, FL — Sources close to local man Jerry...

6 days ago 3
Entire Entrenched Government Bureaucracy To Be Dismantled By Indian Guy And Autistic African American Obsessed With Rockets

Entire Entrenched Government Bureaucracy To Be Dis...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Panicked sources within the nat...

6 days ago 2
What's Next? Here Are 10 Great Career Options For Kamala To Consider

What's Next? Here Are 10 Great Career Options For ...

The American people have spoken, leaving Kamala Ha...

1 week ago 3
Department Of Government Efficiency Identifies 535 Government Workers Who Haven't Done Any Work For Years

Department Of Government Efficiency Identifies 535...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Department of Government Ef...

1 week ago 5
The Government Doesn’t Want You To Know This But You Can Just Form A Fellowship With Your Bros And Go Hiking For Days

The Government Doesn’t Want You To Know This But Y...

There's a cool life hack that the government doesn...

1 week ago 3
Democrats Denounce Satan As 'Too Moderate'

Democrats Denounce Satan As 'Too Moderate'

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats in Washington have ex...

1 week ago 2
APPALLING: New Trump Appointee Has Zero Experience Being A Useless Government Bureaucrat

APPALLING: New Trump Appointee Has Zero Experience...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — To date, Donald Trump has appoi...

1 week ago 2
FBI To Raid Homes Of All 75,000,000 People Who Conspired To Elect Trump

FBI To Raid Homes Of All 75,000,000 People Who Con...

U.S. — Following the news that the CEO of Polymark...

1 week ago 2
Democrats Worried If Government Becomes More Efficient They'll Be Forced To Light Giant Piles Of Money On Fire On Their Own

Democrats Worried If Government Becomes More Effic...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the nation abuzz following...

1 week ago 3
Unclear If Angry-Looking Bald Person A Neo-Nazi Or Leftist Woman

Unclear If Angry-Looking Bald Person A Neo-Nazi Or...

SPRINGFIELD, IL — Despite extensive investigation,...

1 week ago 4

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