By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2025-01-30 18:50:23 | Updated at 2025-01-31 00:13:58
5 hours ago
WASHINGTON, D.C. — FBI Director nominee Kash Patel surprised and shocked Congress today by showing up for his confirmation hearing wearing a "Female Body Inspector" t-shirt.
Patel turned heads in the men's t-shirt that he initially wore under his suit jacket and then revealed during Elizabeth Warren's questioning.
"Mr. Patel! What does that shirt say?" Senator Warren yelled into her microphone. "Female Body….MR. PATEL! That is highly inappropriate! Take that off right now! I will continue yelling things into this microphone until you remove that shirt and put on something more appropriate. YELLING!"
Mr. Patel sat at the hearing desk with a quiet look of satisfaction on his face as the female members of Congress yelled various shocked comments into their microphones. Observers say they thought at one point they witnessed Kristen Gilibrand's head rotate all the way around like something from the exorcist.
"It was an honest mistake," Patel later told members of the press. "I thought this was official FBI gear. I'm sorry for any pain I have caused."
At publishing time, Kash Patel had removed the shirt and sat bare-chested at his desk while listening to Bernie Sanders yell at him about a pair of baby pants available on clearance at Old Navy.
Travis is back on his mission to interview everyone. Next on the list is celebrity chef and restauranteur Andrew Gruel.
