By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2025-04-03 17:20:25 | Updated at 2025-04-04 19:42:40
1 day ago
MILWAUKEE, WI — Local man Aiden Jackson suffered a devastating blow earlier today after he stepped in a little wet spot on the kitchen floor while wearing socks.
Sources say the event has ruined his day, and perhaps his life.
"Ew, my feet are squishy and damp, now," said the man helplessly as the cruel liquid soaked into his socks. "Why would a good God allow such a thing to happen?"
"That's about as bad as it gets, honestly," said Stacy Jackson, Aiden's wife. "I wear slippers in the kitchen myself to avoid just this sort of thing."
Experts say that the emotional damage of stepping in a puddle of water while wearing socks is even worse than that of treading barefoot on a pile of Legos, and about the same as having a piece of popcorn stuck between your teeth with no way to get it out.
"This is devastating for him," said Bradley Nelson, an expert. "He'll have to go change his socks now. So annoying."
At publishing time, Jackson's day had gotten even worse after realizing the wet spot in the kitchen was cat pee.
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