By Free Republic | Created at 2024-10-01 20:25:10 | Updated at 2024-10-08 06:45:40
6 days ago
Exploding Pagers Called "a War Crime" [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 29 September 2024 | John Semmens
Posted on 10/01/2024 11:44:24 AM PDT by John Semmens
Volker Türk, the UN high commissioner for human rights, called Israel's use of exploding cell phones and pagers to attack Hezbollah terrorists "a war crime. This unprecedented method of warfare violates both the expectation of privacy and safety one expects from modern electronic devices. Thousands of jihadis ultimately were injured, castrated, maimed, or killed in coordinated explosions. It also unreasonably endangered nearby civilians who were innocent of any aggression against Israel."
Turk went on to deny that Israel's attack was justified by Hezbollah's repeated launches of missiles into the homes and businesses of Israelis, saying "Israel is unlawfully occupying lands that were justly conquered for Islam more than 1,000 years ago. Their military forces are too powerful to defeat. The only feasible method for dislodging them is for our martyrs to target their women and children for rape and murder. The October 7 attack demonstrated the viability of this strategy. Muslims outnumber Jews by more than 100 to one. If each martyr can kill just one Jew the problem can be resolved."
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu denounced the United Nations, calling it "a swamp of antisemitic bile. Members of the United Nations Relief and Works Agency (UNRWA) participated in the atrocities committed against unarmed Israeli civilians on October 7, 2023. Mothers were raped in front of their children. Children were tortured and decapitated in front of their parents. These were not the kinds of collateral damage that can result from legitimate engagements between opposing armies. These were deliberately selected soft targets chosen by the cowards who seek to exterminate my people."
In response to Israel's use of exploding pagers against Hezbollah, Reps. Pramila Jayapal (D-Wa), André Carson (D-In), and Jan Schakowsky (D-Ill) have introduced the United Nations Relief and Works Agency Funding Emergency Restoration Act of 2024. "While the actions of a few UNRWA employees who joined in perpetrating the rapes and murders of October 7, 2023 were regrettable, we believe that UNRWA funding needs to be restored," Schakowsky said. "True, UNRWA regularly calls for the murder of Jews, and creates teaching materials that glorify terrorism, encourage martyrdom, demonize Israelis, and incite antisemitism. However, the portion of the humanitarian aid UNRWA provides to Palestine that is not stolen by Hamas trickles down to the masses and saves lives."
If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...
https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,542605.0.html
TOPICS: Government; Humor; Military/Veterans; Politics
KEYWORDS: hezbollah; israel; satire; un
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1 posted on 10/01/2024 11:44:24 AM PDT by John Semmens
To: John Semmens
Nope-more like a Bugs Bunny cartoon. That’s all folks!
2 posted on 10/01/2024 11:53:25 AM PDT by DIRTYSECRET
To: John Semmens
Seldom have war crimes resulted in such widespread mirth. It still makes me chuckle.
3 posted on 10/01/2024 11:57:03 AM PDT by Seruzawa ("The Political left is the Garden of Eden of incompetence" - Marx the Smarter (Groucho))
To: DIRTYSECRET
If we learned one thing from Looney Tunes/Merry Melodies is that you never buy anything from Acme.
4 posted on 10/01/2024 11:57:18 AM PDT by xp38
To: John Semmens
My new I-phone from MossyAd should be safe, right?
5 posted on 10/01/2024 12:05:04 PM PDT by dynachrome (Auslander Raus!)
To: John Semmens
ha ha!
if that’s a “war crime” then we hope and pray to see many many more “war crimes” like that from the IDF
the world deserves to be rid of the Satanic bloodthirsty Fakestinians, Iranian dictators, and their enablers, once and for all!
6 posted on 10/01/2024 12:07:55 PM PDT by faithhopecharity ("Politicians aren't born, they're excreted." Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 to 43 BCE))
To: xp38
** we learned one thing from Looney Tunes/Merry Melodies is that you never buy anything from Acme.**
You r even funnier than me!
7 posted on 10/01/2024 12:16:02 PM PDT by DIRTYSECRET
To: DIRTYSECRET
More like the Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner. Except instead of the pagers being made by ACME, they’re made by Mossad.
8 posted on 10/01/2024 12:23:34 PM PDT by EvilCapitalist (Pets are no substitute for children)
To: DIRTYSECRET
State of Israel declared 1948 May 14. Created that same year Wile E Coyote and the Road Runner for Warner Bros. Fast and Furryous is first released Sept. 17 1949. Coincidence? I think not. ACME.....a secret subsidiary of Mossad.
9 posted on 10/01/2024 12:55:50 PM PDT by xp38
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