Nineteen-year-old Alexa Gourneau was diagnosed with leukemia aged just nine.
After a decade of chemotherapy, blood transfusions and hospital stays, she has decided to stop care and spend the rest of her days as a normal teenager.
The terminally ill youngster has unveiled a bucket list that she hopes to complete in the time she has left.
She plans to eat pasta with her family, skateboard, hang out with her friends, snuggle with her dog and go to concerts. She also hopes to see places like Puerto Rico, Hawaii, South Carolina, Universal Studios and Paris.
Gourneau's mother, Holly Vaughn, wrote on the family's GoFundMe: 'One day we were driving together and she opened up to me in a way she never had before. Through tears she said "Mom, I just wish I could be a normal 19-year-old for a little while."'
'She told me she was tired of feeling sick, tired of the hospital stays, the needles, the medications, and never feeling like herself.'
Alexa Gourneau, 19, has decided to stop leukemia treatment after a decade of hospital stays, chemotherapy, medications, and blood transfusions. 'I'm, like, over getting poked at and prodded at,' she said
Gourneau plans to spend her days cuddling with her dog, eating her favorite foods, spending time outside, and seeing her friends and family as much as she can
According to the GoFundMe set up by her mother, Gourneau said: 'Mom, I’ve thought about this for a long time. I can laugh and joke around with you guys, but you don’t see what happens when I’m alone. You don’t see how exhausted I am or how much I hurt'
The decision was hard to explain to her loved ones.
Gourneau said to KHQ: 'They get to leave if they want. They're not the ones sitting here having to get poked at all the time, bugged, having to take all these medicines, feeling tired just by even walking down the stairs.'
'I'm, like, over getting poked at and prodded at, like, this is not the quality of life that I want. This isn't a good quality of life,' she said.
Gourneau's father, Justin Vaughn, said: 'As tough as it is to say, I agree with your decision, it's also super hard, because as a parent, you never want to bury your child. You want it to be the reverse where you want your child to bury you when you get to that age,' KHQ reported.
Gourneau's prognosis is unclear, although doctors have warned her she may not make it to her 20th birthday in January 2027.
Vaughn, her mother, said: 'We don’t know exactly how long we have. We only know that our time to make these memories is now. We don’t want to waste a single day.'
Gourneau's mother said: 'This wasn't a decision she made overnight.'
'As her mom, I asked her every question I could think of. I needed to know this wasn't just a hard day. I needed to understand her heart.'
'Through it all, Alexa has never let cancer define who she is. She’s vibrant. She’s a little bit of fire… an old soul with the biggest heart. She loves her family, loves being on the lake, snuggling with her hound dog, watching movies, and finding joy in life’s simple moments,' Gourneau's mother wrote on the family's GoFundMe
Gourneau said the decision was hard to explain to her loved ones, as they have never experienced the illness firsthand
Gourneau's mother, Holly Vaughn, frequently shares updates on her daughter's journey on her social media
Holly has made the decision to take time off work to spend as much time as she can with her daughter. The family started a GoFundMe to cover travel, everyday living expenses and make up some of Holly's lost income.
'Whether we make it to every place or not, what matters most is simply being together while she's still feeling well enough to enjoy it.'
Gourneau shared with KHQ: 'When people think about death, they get scared. But me personally, when I think about death, I know I'm going to heaven. I can imagine myself at a beach where the sand isn't too hot, but it isn't too cold, and just being able to walk around without being tired. Just feeling normal. Whatever normal feels like.'
