By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2026-09-02 16:55:11 | Updated at 2026-09-02 18:53:25
1 hour ago
HEAVEN — Heavenly sources report that the Lord has decided it is once again time to wipe out most of humanity after Kentuck Fried Chicken released the Oreo Chicken Sandwich.
"The earth cries out for justice," Angel Clement C. Harding said after reading about the chicken sandwich/oreo cookie abomination. "He's going to have to flood the whole place again. We can't let this one slide."
The realization came after fried chicken giant KFC announced this week it was releasing a new sandwich coated in chocolate cookie crumbs. Many believe this is a clear sign of the irredeemable state of the globe.
"We need another global flood to cleanse us of this one," Heaven resident Sally Dresden said. "I've seen this pattern; there's no coming back from this. We'll need to get someone to build an ark; it's a process."
Many believe that allowing humanity to exist when such wickedness exists is unmerciful, and a cleansing flood is the only way to release God's children from the wrath of such abominations.
At publishing time, another flood was issued for something called "Rings of Power."
The Babylon Bee finally exposes everything about the Jews in this documentary of hard-hitting investigative journalism.
