By The Daily Caller (Opinion) | Created at 2024-11-14 18:29:19 | Updated at 2024-11-22 20:16:47
1 week ago
November 14, 2024 12:01 PM ET
Note: This is a satirical piece.
Newsweek lamented Nov. 9th, “Harris has 69 million votes, more than twelve million fewer than the 81.2 million votes Biden got in 2020. Trump is currently at 72.6 million.”
The title of the piece was “Where Did the Millions of Joe Biden Votes Go?”
But looky here: In Joe Biden’s barnstorming basement campaign “COVID win” against Trump in 2020, he got 81 million in 2020. It looks like Kamala Harris will end up with about 75 million votes.
Thus, Biden got a whopping six million-ish more votes than in previous elections, and even more than in the heated 2024 contest. Maybe it was because he was a once-in-a-lifetime, transformative candidate like no other. New to politics, he captured the imagination of fourteen to fifteen more voters than the other candidates and produced an almost impossible mathematical aberration never seen in U.S. voting patterns.
Nah, just kidding. It feels like something weird happened in 2020.
Many citizens wanted answers. The “Jan. 6th” crowd went to the Capitol and acted up, but they had reason to be concerned. Yeah, a lot of them looked like extras from “Duck Dynasty,” but their instincts were right. There is no way they should still be rotting in solitary confinement in federal prisons. That was an epic misuse of government; it was Democrat lawfare. The Dems’ message: “Yeah, we are sleazy and corrupt, but if you peasants come to D.C. and monkey with our honey hole, you will pay.”
It backfired.
The Libs are performing right on cue. They cry, “The world is falling apart: A dictator is elected. Democracy is over” ad nauseam. Late Night “comedian” Jimmy Kimmel started crying when talking about Trump winning. It was the funniest he has been in 8 years.
Predictably, lefties say they are going to leave the country (always for Canada, New Zealand, Australia and your better parts of Europe) to escape racism. Oddly, these are almost all “White Dominion” British Commonwealth countries. You never hear them say they want to try out the ravages of socialism in Venezuela and look into joining a gang there.
With the off-base conclusions as to why Dems lost, it is clear that misogyny, racism and ignorance of the other side (aka “We are so much smarter”), are their normal go-to laments. But they missed the message. We want to be left alone to live and laugh. I will know that Kamala has figured it out if, when she throws her hat into the ring for the 2028 presidential race, she opens with a Puerto Rico joke.
“It’s the economy stupid,” but Dems no longer get that. Kamala spent millions on getting celebs like Lizzo and Oprah to endorse her. Both needed the money, once they saw how high the price of ice cream and butter have gotten. There was one symbolic moment when Lizzo was asked to sit at the back of the bus, but it turns out that it was just for balance.
No one cares what celebs think about politics. Hollywood needs them to just keep on doing what they do best: cocaine and themselves. If Taylor Swift sang at my funeral, I’d get up and walk out.
I can no longer even watch “The View,” and not for the reasons you think. I just feel sorry for those chairs. No one is buying what they are selling; they might as well be door-to-door beeper salesmen in Gaza.
Tim Walz survived days in battleground states and will go home and add a Purple Heart to his resume.
Losing this election has economic impacts on many Democrat faithful, like the donors who gave $1 billion to Kamala that she blew. And just imagine how much time Hunter Biden is spending telling nefarious countries, “Sorry, no refunds.”
If Trump ends the two wars, extends tax cuts and does away with taxes on tips and maybe Social Security, drills to get energy prices down, gets inflation and crime under control and the stock market continues as is, no one is going to want to shoot him.
Ron Hart is a libertarian op-ed humorist, an award-winning author, and a frequent guest on TV and radio. He can be contacted at @RonaldHart on X.
The views and opinions expressed in this commentary are those of the author and do not reflect the official position of the Daily Caller.
