Influencer Sydney Towle, 26, shares heartbreaking update about her cancer battle: 'I'm sick of the constant pain'

Influencer Sydney Towle has shared a heartbreaking update about her experience with a rare bile duct cancer as she admitted that she is 'sick of the constant pain.'

The 26-year-old made headlines last month after her stunning catwalk appearance at Miami Swim Week, just weeks after doctors urged her to seek end-of-life care. 

However, in a heartbreaking post shared to her Substack on Tuesday, the model admitted she is in 'constant pain' as she faces her 'new reality.'

'I haven't really wanted to touch my phone. All I want to do is sleep, not be awake for the pain and constant nausea,' Towle wrote.

The influencer said she is now 'connected to an IV pole,' which is her 'new reality.'

'I press the button for pain medication, but it's never enough,' she shared. 'But it's also too much. I don't want to sleep all day [and] become a zombie.'

She then quoted what she had been told by medical professionals about her prognosis and potential end of life care.

'You have a very large tumor sitting on your duodenum, blocking any liquid or food from passing through,' she wrote.

'You also have a lot of liquid pressing on your intestines now. We understand if you don't want to proceed. You've been through so much, if you just want pain medicine and to be at peace, we support that.'

Towle said that 'everything' she eats and drinks comes back up.

'But I still drink juice and tea anyway, it's all I want, even when it comes back up 10 minutes later,' she shared, describing it as 'painful' and 'acidic.'

The model said she now feels 'five times' her age physically, and if she doesn't urinate frequently, her bladder will leak at random.

'[I'm] supposed to get a central catheter but I don't want to be in any more pain. I'm sick of the constant pain,' she somberly wrote.

Despite this, Towle says she's not giving up hope. 

'When asked if I want to keep going, I say of course,' she bravely wrote.

'I can't imagine going out peacefully at this point when I've been fighting for so long to stay alive,' she continued. 'Maybe this will work. Maybe, and statistically much more likely, it won't. But I want to try.'

The content creator, who was diagnosed with a rare bile duct cancer three years ago, walked in The Chemo Club x Post Swim runway show on May 28. 

After returning home to New York City, Towle shared the harsh reality of putting herself through the event – even though she described the experience as a 'dream come true.'

In a video shared to TikTok, Towle told her one million followers that while the trip wasn't easy on her health, she doesn't want to stop doing 'things that are fun.'

'I haven't been showing it because I've been trying to take in as much of the week as possible and enjoy it, but I have been in a lot of pain, and I'm still extremely nauseous,' she said.

Towle said that while she plans to go to urgent care for further medical help, doing the catwalk wouldn't have made her free from pain.

'If you see a video of me in the hospital, it's just because I feel safer there sometimes when I'm in pain,' she continued.

'Regardless of if I had gone or not, I would be in pain and nauseous. That's just the nature of where I'm at right now.' 

Towle's participating in the event came just weeks after her oncologist said that he will no longer treat her and that he wanted her to transition to end-of-life care.

'I said no,' the influencer said in a video. 'We are not at the point where we're giving up.'