San Francisco Parents Find Piece Of Candy In Child’s Bucket Of Needles

By Free Republic | Created at 2024-11-01 16:57:25 | Updated at 2024-11-05 23:12:12 4 days ago

San Francisco Parents Find Piece Of Candy In Child’s Bucket Of Needles
The Bee ^ | Oct 31, 2024 | The Bee

Posted on 11/01/2024 9:46:04 AM PDT by dayglored

SAN FRANCISCO, CA — A pair of local parents were in for a shock Halloween night after discovering a stray piece of candy in their child's bag of needles.

According to Jim and Grace Kohler, the candy was not discovered until late Halloween night, after their son Ben had gotten home and was sorting through his haul of used hypodermic needles and shattered crack pipes.

"He dumped it all out on the kitchen table and we were just sort of poking through it all," Jim recalls. "Then I caught a glimpse of a brown, red, and blue wrapper through the forest of used hypodermics — a Snickers. My heart just dropped. What kind of a psychopath would hand out this sugar-filled garbage to children? And how in the world are we supposed to dispose of it?"

The Kohlers reportedly called 911 for advice on how to dispose of the dangerous biohazard and later turned it in to their local police station, which has launched an investigation to see if any other children have been exposed.

At publishing time, the Kohlers had been shocked to learn the person who handed out the candy bars hadn't even been dressed as a drag queen.

TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; california; candy; needles; sanfrancisco; satire

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The Bee is back to publishing real news, I see.

1 posted on 11/01/2024 9:46:04 AM PDT by dayglored

To: dayglored

They crossed that line over a year ago. Probably almost 4 to be exact.

2 posted on 11/01/2024 9:48:29 AM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus”)

To: dayglored

Save the razor blades. Some people use them for shaving.

3 posted on 11/01/2024 9:48:32 AM PDT by Billthedrill

To: dayglored; AdmSmith; AnonymousConservative; Arthur Wildfire! March; Berosus; Bockscar; BraveMan; ...

LOLOLOLOL!!!

Ooops, I mean, sad but true.

4 posted on 11/01/2024 9:49:37 AM PDT by SunkenCiv (Putin should skip ahead to where he kills himself in the bunker.)

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