Influencer, Speaker, Confidence Coach, and Podcaster
Updated Oct 16, 2024
We’ve all been there, right? Sitting in that awkward in-between space where we have no idea what the next move should be. It’s like life is one big traffic jam, and no matter how many different ways we try to maneuver, we’re stuck. Every path looks blurry, and nothing feels certain.
Trust me, I know that feeling all too well. I’ve spent more time in that “stuck” place than I care to admit. And if you’ve read my story, you know that my life has been anything but a straight line. There have been moments where I’ve felt like no matter what decision I made, I’d end up in the wrong place—or worse, nowhere at all.
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1. Acknowledge the Feeling
Let me be real with you: feeling stuck doesn’t mean you’re failing. It doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. In fact, sometimes, feeling stuck is the space we need to figure out what’s really going on inside us. But I didn’t always see it that way. When I was younger, I thought that if I didn’t have everything figured out, it meant I was doing life wrong.
I’ll never forget when I dropped out of high school the first time. Yep, the first time. I was 17 and had already been through more trauma than most people experience in a lifetime. I was bouncing from one school to another, trying to keep it together on the outside while falling apart on the inside. Eventually, the weight of it all got to be too much. I just couldn’t do it anymore.
Dropping out felt like failure. It felt like I was letting everyone down, especially myself. And the worst part? I had no idea what to do next. I felt stuck in a loop of shame and self-doubt. I was so focused on trying to live up to other people’s expectations that I didn’t realize I needed to stop and ask myself what I wanted. But back then, that wasn’t clear to me. I was just trying to survive.
If you’re in a season of feeling stuck, let me tell you something: it’s okay. You don’t have to have all the answers right now. And you definitely don’t need to rush yourself into making decisions you’re not ready to make. Sometimes, being stuck is an invitation to slow down, reflect, and allow yourself the grace to not have it all figured out. God’s not asking you to have a perfect plan—He’s asking you to trust Him in the mess.
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2. Invite God into the Uncertainty
Here’s the thing about feeling stuck: it often makes us feel like God’s forgotten about us, right? Like He’s gone radio silent and left us to figure everything out on our own. But let me tell you, that’s not how it works.
I’ve had moments where I was screaming, “God, where are You?” I was in my twenties, a single mom of two, trying to figure out what direction to take next. At that time, I felt like my life was a chaotic mess. I was exhausted from juggling work, kids, and my own doubts about whether I was doing anything right. I didn’t know how to balance everything or what path I was supposed to be on.
I remember this one night—it was late, and the kids were finally asleep. I was sitting on the couch, staring at the ceiling, feeling completely lost. I hadn’t prayed in a while, but in that moment, I let it all out: “God, I don’t know what I’m doing. I need You to step in because I can’t do this alone.”
And here’s the crazy part—I didn’t get some big, clear answer. There was no voice from the sky, no epiphany. But what I did get was a sense of peace. A kind of calm that let me know it was okay not to have everything figured out. That night, I stopped asking God to show me the exact plan and started asking Him to walk with me through the uncertainty. And let me tell you, that made all the difference. Instead of being consumed by my indecision, I started to trust that even though I didn’t know what was next, He did.
If you’re in that place right now, feeling lost and confused, invite God into it. You don’t have to have it all together. Be real with Him. He’s not scared of your mess, your doubts, or your indecision. He’s with you right in the middle of it.
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3. Take Small Steps Forward
One of the hardest parts about feeling stuck is that it can make you feel like you have to figure everything out in one big leap. I used to think that moving forward meant making huge, life-altering decisions all at once. But here’s what I’ve learned: it’s not always about making a giant leap. Sometimes, it’s about taking small, consistent steps in the right direction.
After dropping out of high school the second time (yep, I did it again), I was in a dark place. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. It felt like everyone else had their act together, and I was the only one still trying to figure it out. But I knew one thing—I couldn’t stay where I was.
So, I started small. I didn’t know what my ultimate plan was, but I took the first step. I got my GED, enrolled in community college, and kept showing up. Did I have it all figured out? Nope. But those small steps helped me move out of that stuck place, one decision at a time.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by indecision, don’t put pressure on yourself to figure everything out at once. Maybe your next step is a simple one—taking a class, having a conversation, or even just giving yourself permission to rest. Whatever it is, don’t underestimate the power of small, steady progress. Each step forward, no matter how small, is a victory.
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4. Let Go of the Fear of Failure
One of the biggest things that kept me stuck for a long time was the fear of failure. I was terrified of making the wrong decision, so I wouldn’t make any decisions at all. I thought that if I messed up, my life would fall apart (as if it wasn’t already a hot mess at that point). But here’s what I’ve learned: God’s plan for your life isn’t so fragile that one wrong decision can derail it.
After becoming a single mom, I was so scared of messing up my kids’ lives. I worried constantly about whether I was making the right choices for them. There were nights when I’d stay up late, overthinking every decision. Should I move? Should I change jobs? What if I choose wrong, and it hurts them?
But God showed me something during that season—He’s not expecting me to be perfect. He’s not sitting up there with a checklist, waiting for me to make a mistake. I had to let go of that fear and trust that even if I made a wrong turn, God could and would redirect me.
If you’re feeling stuck because you’re scared of making the wrong decision, let me remind you: God’s grace is bigger than your mistakes. You can’t mess up His plan for your life. Let go of the fear and trust that even if you stumble, He’s got you.
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5. Trust in the Waiting
Sometimes, the hardest part of feeling stuck isn’t the indecision—it’s the waiting. Waiting for clarity. Waiting for something to happen. Waiting for a sign that you’re on the right path. And let me tell you, I am not the most patient person in the world, so waiting has never been easy for me.
I have been in seasons in my life where it felt like everything was at a standstill. I was working hard, showing up every day, but nothing seemed to be moving forward. It felt like I was just going through the motions, and the results I was hoping for weren’t coming. I wanted to quit, but I knew deep down that God was still working, even if I couldn’t see it.
That season of waiting taught me something important: just because you’re not seeing progress right now doesn’t mean God isn’t doing something behind the scenes. He’s working in the waiting. Sometimes, it’s not about rushing to the finish line; it’s about letting God work on you while you’re in the process.
If you’re in a waiting season, trust that God is preparing you for what’s next. You might not see the results right now, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t coming. Trust that He’s working, even when it feels like nothing is happening.
Feeling stuck or indecisive is part of life. It doesn’t mean you’re failing or that you’re lost forever. Whether you’re at a crossroads, waiting for clarity, or scared to take the next step, know that God is with you. Invite Him into the uncertainty, take small steps forward, and trust that even in the waiting, He’s working. And remember—being stuck doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re being shaped into who you’re meant to be.
Excerpt taken from "Confidence Is an Inside Job," by Ashley Henriott, published by Waterbrook, an imprint of Random House. Used with permission.
Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/BartekSzewczyk
Originally published Wednesday, 16 October 2024.
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