ABC star reveals his father and grandpa killed themselves in shocking family tragedy that was 'like a bomb going off'

ABC star James Longman said it felt like a 'bomb going off' when his father and grandfather committed suicide while revealing his family's struggle with mental health. 

Longman, 37, of London, lost his father John, who suffered from schizophrenia, when he was just nine years old. His father, an artist, had set his apartment on fire and jumped out the window, according to the The I Paper. 

He learned of his father's passing while at boarding school in England, where he was left with five other boys and no explanation as to why his father was gone or what caused the fire. 

This wasn't the first suicide the Longman family had suffered through, as the ABC News journalist also lost his grandfather, Jimmy, to suicide. 

'When someone dies by suicide, it's like a bomb going off. It kills the person and it injuries everybody else,' he told his GMA colleagues on Tuesday ahead of his book release. 

Longman began investigating his father's illness, as well as his family history, to understand his parent and to 'find him' outside of his death. 

'When someone ends their life, it's the only thing someone kind of remembers and that defines them,' he said. 'So much was kept from, so much secrecy. So it's a journey of finding him and who he was away from illness.' 

The chief international correspondent tracked down people from his father's life, including one of his caretakers who only lived 20 minutes away from him. He also delved into 120 pages of his father's medical records to find answers. 

Longman's father had been institutionalized before he was born and throughout his research, he found that John had undergone electroconvulsive therapy, also known as ECT, and was on antipsychotics, which he took irregularly.

After his parents separated when Longman was only three, his father would continue to be in and out of mental hospitals and being cared for by professionals.  

'His carer told me: "I took your dad to your school once because he said he wanted to be near you." Thinking about it now makes me cry, because I knew that I was loved, but I didn’t [know if my father wanted me],' he told The I Paper. 

'But to know that that day, he asked her to drive him near my school, I feel so warm thinking about it. He wanted to be near me. That was the single most amazing thing that I found out.' 

Another discovery he made through his research was that his father - who had attempted suicide before his birth - had been cared for. 

'Because [of] my father’s life, I had always imagined that he wasn’t cared for. And actually, what I discovered is he had a lot of care,' he told the British outlet. 'He had a day centre he could go to, a day hospital, art therapy classes. If he needed to see psychiatrists, it would happen within a week. 

'And none of that is available now.' 

Longman's father and grandfather weren't the only ones in his family who suffered from mental illness as his Uncle Tony also suffered from schizophrenia and his mother, Ann, has depression. 

The British-born journalist also admitted to GMA that he has suffered from a 'deep sadness' in the past. 

Ann often describes the family's mental health struggles as 'The Longman Curse,' he told The I Paper. 

This pushed Longman to look into genetics and how it interacts with developing mental illness. 

He spoke with geneticists, neuroscientists, and mental health experts to get a deeper understanding to look into how trauma can be passed down genetically through generations. 

'You can’t change your genetic make-up but you can turn up or turn down predispositions. You can inherit trauma, but you can also inherit healing,' he told The I Paper. 

He also believes his mother distancing herself from his father may have saved him from suffering from schizophrenia himself, which often appears in people before the age of 20. 

'There’s every chance she saved me from schizophrenia, I think,' he told the British outlet. 

Longman, who is married to Alex Brannan, also spoke about how community is important in life and having a support system. 

'Community is so powerful,' he said. 'When people have these illnesses in these families they often get cut off.

'Alex to me has really just been my savior. He's just the most beautiful human being and if you find people in your life that can get your through that's what you need.' 

Longman himself has suffered from suicidal thoughts in the past and credits his husband for keeping him on this earth when they resurfaced in 2022. 

He described his own depression as feeling like a 'deep sense of doom, of pointlessness. I'm emotionless.' 

'It’s not that I get upset, it’s that I cannot find joy,' he said. He also thinks his depression is linked to his anxiety, overthinking, and exhaustion.  

Ultimately, Longman is aware of the stigma that surrounds mental health and hoping his half-memoir-half-research book will help others struggling. 

'The point of the book is to give people hope,' Longman said. 'There's so much shame associated with these issues, and the idea is to punch through that shame and tell people there is a path forward.'