The Babylon Bee

Sad: Hezbollah's Turnover Rate Officially Surpasses McDonald's
'Now Who Am I Supposed To Send My Wordle Score To?' Cries Rashida Tlaib
Kamala Announces Construction Of 'Murderers Only' Express Lane At Southern Border
'Do You Have A Business Card?' Asks Man Who Must Be Time Traveler From 1987
After Extensive Research, Political Experts Believe Harris Struggling to Connect With Male Voters Because She’s Awful
8 Changes Coming To The Oakland A's After They Move to Vegas
Exploding Restaurant Buzzer Takes Out Hezbollah Party Of 6
Jesus Fails To Cast Demons Out As He Was Speaking Aramaic Instead Of Latin
Rookie Move: Husband Asks Wife How Her Day Was
DECEIT: This Man Tricked Millions Of Innocent Kids Into Thinking Bible Characters Were Talking Vegetables
Sad: Drag Queen Wants To Perform But There Aren't Any Kids Around
Harris Campaign Declines To Say Whether She Supports The Hurricane Or Not
Acting U.S. President Stops By Whitehouse To Pick Up Paycheck
Media Warn Florida Hurricane May Hamper Ongoing Trump Assassination Attempts
Eric Adams Declares New York A Sanctuary City For Mayors Facing Federal Criminal Charges
Women Are Really Cool. Here Are Just 9 Reasons Why.
Democrats Summon Best Bounty Hunters In The Galaxy To Hunt Down Trump
After Being Asked Where His Brother Is, Cain Explains To God That He Grew Up In A Middle Class Family
Black Man Faces Punishment For Disobeying His Democrat Masters
NFL Refs Follow Patrick Mahomes To His House, Get Him A Glass Of Warm Milk, Tuck Him In, Read Him A Story, Give Him A Little Kiss