By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2026-09-10 16:35:14 | Updated at 2026-09-10 17:45:04
1 hour ago
DRAPER, UT — Experts issued a new warning this week that the construction of massive data centers could soon take up all the abandoned fields millennials were currently using as locations for family photoshoots.
"We're very concerned about this," data center critic Lindy Church told reporters. "These poor young people won't be able to stand in a field of tall grass in their plaids and their ginghams and take family photos. It's a real travesty."
Data center construction has been the topic of intense controversy in recent months, with many expressing concerns that the giant buildings could take up much-needed photography space.
"I went to take my engagement photos in that abandoned field on the outskirts of town, and there was a giant data center there," Tilda Mason said. "Now where are my fiancée and I supposed to go to take our folksy, farm-looking pics? Ugh, I hate data centers."
Proponents of the data centers suggested that millennials could use any of the other 50,000 vacant lots around the country, a suggestion that was met with intense anger by just about everyone.
"Protect the vacant lots!" yelled a protester at a recent event. "The tumbleweeds need places to roll!"
At publishing time, data center critics also warned that new construction could greatly impact the availability of gritty music album photoshoots at abandoned industrial sites.
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