By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2024-11-16 15:40:22 | Updated at 2024-11-16 17:29:02
1 hour ago
U.S. — After winding up in debt from blowing through $1.2 billion in just three months, Vice President Kamala Harris called in to the Dave Ramsey Show to ask for some financial guidance.
"One point two... billion dollars," repeated Ramsey slowly, attempting to wrap his mind around the story. "And you say you did this in just three months? Meaning, you spent half a million dollars every hour, even while sleeping, for three straight months? Oh... my... gracious. Where do I begin?"
Always the professional, Ramsey began by gathering more background information about Harris's financial situation. "So, you're saying you also just got fired?" asked Ramsey, incredulous. "No job prospects, except fast food? Okay, well let's talk about those expenditures, to see if there are any assets you purchased during your spree that you could sell to pay off debt. You paid a rapper to twerk?? No, I don't believe you can sell twerks back, I don't think it works like that."
At publishing time, Ramsey had reiterated to listeners that the envelope system could have easily prevented this tragic billion-dollar spending spree.
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