TGIF: Hellfire

Hello and welcome back to TGIF, where I wander through piles of ash and figure out which one of you is to blame (it was not me, nor my tiny decorative brushfire).

→ California down: Los Angeles is currently battling the most destructive wildfire in Los Angeles County history. The Palisades are gone—all those beautiful homes with those beautiful views just up in smoke. Evacuation orders have impacted nearly 180,000 people. Toxic air is engulfing millions more. With first responders tied up, looters are out in force. The fire hydrants have run out of water. Truly, the collapse we’re seeing in Los Angeles is every California chicken coming home to every California roost.

Let’s start from the top. The Los Angeles County Fire Department sent a load of their “surplus” gear to Ukraine in 2022, because it felt right to do that. From KTLA in 2022: “Boots, hoses, nozzles, body armor and medication were among the items packed and shipped out.” Don’t need extra of those. You’re welcome, Slava Ukraini!

And don’t forget: Growing firefighter diversity has been the main priority for the L.A. department of late, with a whole special equity bureau. And much has been made of the beautiful rainbow leading the department, run by a lesbian. Should I care that a lesbian saves me lesbianly? You might say, you’re already a woman married to a woman, you’re doing enough. But it’s true: Unless the firefighter is singing “Come to My Window,” I won’t get on the ladder.

And what’s an L.A. story without unchecked crime? With all first responders tied up, into the breach ran those who love chaos and want more homes to loot. Friend of The Free Press Andrew Huberman took this video of a group of men starting a new fire. And of course, there are missing hydrants all over the city because people have been stealing them for years. “Between January 2023 and May 2024, more than 300 fire hydrants were stolen from L.A. County streets, according to data from the Golden State Water Company, which manages the fire hydrants.” Some of the hydrants are sold as scrap metal. Residents are asked to call if they notice a missing hydrant.

And where was Los Angeles mayor Karen Bass while the fires ravaged? Naturally she was in Ghana attending the inauguration of the incoming president there.

Mayor Bass, at the airport, was asked: “Do you owe citizens an apology for being absent while their homes were burning?” Bass froze and escaped through a restricted door. The fires will be the most expensive in U.S. history, with AccuWeather now estimating the cost between $52 billion and $57 billion, though the fires still rage and I suspect that number will climb much, much higher.

→ Taxpaying exists in a pact: We write a check and in exchange we get basic social services, roads, fire and police protection. But in California, the government gets that check, considers fixing the roads or hiring cops, and decides: Ghana for New Year’s. Let’s go on a trip to Ghana. Because you have to understand that in California, the elected officials hate the taxpayers. The mayor of Los Angeles hates the Palisades. It’s a neighborhood full of rich, privileged, non–DEI compliant, annoying Rick Caruso voters. The fire warnings had already come out when Mayor Bass ignored them and left for her trip.

Infrastructure that could have provided more water for those fires has been on hold, tied up in red tape. Ten years ago, California voters approved spending $7.5 billion to build water storage and improve state water facilities—but by 2023 not one dam had been finished, per the Los Angeles Times. Not a single one. But a decade into various environmental regulations and reviews, they are moving.

→ Also, there’s a little fish: It’s called the delta smelt, average size 2 inches and 10 grams, that environmentalists discovered and have used for decades to block any water releases in Central and Southern California. That little delta smelt is native to the waters, they say, and oh so endangered. Residents of Los Angeles should have kept a few delta smelt as pets and perhaps a little water could have gotten to them. Personally, I now identify as a delta smelt, which is how I get 911 to show for me and me alone. The Palisades might be in danger, but I’m endangered too, baby!