By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2025-03-18 19:20:34 | Updated at 2025-03-20 18:19:16
1 day ago
LAS VEGAS, NV — An awful Republican-voting Tesla owner has repented of his evil ways and vowed to vote Democrat in the future after having their Cybertruck destroyed by a Democrat activist.
The campaign to protest Elon Musk, DOGE, and Donald Trump by destroying other people's property and terrorizing drivers is expected to raise awareness of how awful Republicans are. Experts also say the miraculous change of heart for this Tesla owner, Brandon Powers, is undoubtedly the first of many to come from such acts of righteous property destruction.
"I was pricked to the heart," recalled Brandon of his conversion to the Democratic Party. "When I saw that swastika carved into the door of my brand new Cybertruck, I knew right then and there that my ways were going to have to change."
"I was so blind but now I see," continued Brandon. "How could I not see that owning and driving this futuristic electric vehicle was the moral equivalent of supporting Adolf Hitler? I see that now."
Brandon told reporters that he would be more politically careful with his next car purchase and was looking into something reliable and practical like a Volkswagen.
At publishing time, liberal activists were encouraged by Brandon's testimony to continue their acts of violent terror in the fight against fascism.
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