By The Babylon Bee | Created at 2026-09-14 17:45:15 | Updated at 2026-09-14 18:56:17
1 hour ago
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump announced a new plan today to combat inflation by sending every American one million dollars.
With Americans struggling financially and the pivotal midterm elections looming in November, the president hatched what administration sources described as a foolproof plan to deal with inflation by printing and giving away more free money.
"It's going to work perfectly," Trump explained. "We're going to raise the national debt by just a bit, but we're going to send everyone a check for a million dollars. Then we're going to print a bunch of money to offset the debt. It's the perfect plan, believe me. Nobody has ever done anything like it."
The plan was met with some concern by economists, who said printing that much money could lead to hyperinflation and crash the economy. Trump countered the criticism by calling the economists "losers."
"Those guys don't know anything," the president said. "I know how the economy works, because I'm very wealthy myself. We'll give everyone a million dollars. Even the losers and haters. Inflation will be destroyed forever, everyone will love it, and we'll win big in November."
Despite pushback from the media about the legality of the plan, Trump was adamant that if Republicans win the midterm elections in November, he will do everything he can to make every adult American citizen a millionaire with newly printed money.
At publishing time, the U.S. deficit had reached $50 trillion.
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